


Always You

by sehunnies



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-09
Updated: 2015-01-09
Packaged: 2018-03-06 21:54:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3149642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sehunnies/pseuds/sehunnies
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>And everything suddenly crashes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Always You

**Author's Note:**

> already posted on LJ

  
  
  
**how to destroy someone**  
  
draw constellations on his back, be it bare or clothed skin. he'll sigh peacefully while the pads of your fingers trace the bones of his body with adoration. he'll say  _lu han, i wonder when will this end_ while licking his lips (something you hate, by the way) and hiding his arms under the pillow of your shared bed. you'll answer  _someday we'll be fine, won't we?_  which is more of a question than an answer, but you think how you'll be able to figure out something you haven't even thought of yet.  
  
  
  
  
kiss his lips every once in a while. kiss him, until your own turn a bright shade of red and your tongue gets tired of tasting the roof of his mouth. kiss him until he's seeing stars, the very same you've planted within him with your existence and your love. kiss him under the sun, under the sunset, under the moon, under the bright lights of seoul. kiss him everyday until you paint yourself in the corners of his mind and he's not able to think of anything else but you. kiss him until he's whispering your name,  _lu han, lu han, lu han_. kiss him, because, who knows? maybe this is the last time you'll see him.  
  
  


 

 

  
  
 **bleed at the slightest word**  
  
don't say  _i love you, sehun_  because it's not fair. just as how it's not fair how his eyes turn into crescent moons and his lips form a thin line, either. just as how it's not fair to make him fall for  _you_ , someone who's used to keep people at reach but never too close. just as how it's not fair to let him hold your head, look into your eyes, caress your cheeks, kiss your lips.  
  
  
  
  
don't say  _i'll keep you, sehun_ because you simply won't. at some point, you'll leave him and he'll cry. you'll cry too, not for something you've lost, but for something you couldn't keep. and it won't be your fault, it won't be his fault, neither. love ends somewhere along the road, in the middle of kisses and thrusts at midnight and fights versus insults that easily come out when both are angry for silly things.  
  
  
  
  
he'll say  _you had everything from me_  and you'll cringe at the sound of sehun hiccuping whilst crying in the living room, hands rubbing at his eyes furiously and glassy eyes looking at everything but you.  _i know_ , you respond even though he isn't blaming you for leaving him. it's funny, though. how you're cold and distant while he's the total opposite, transparent and sensitive. perhaps you don't remember now, but baekhyun once said very seriously that he could be an asshole if you wanted him to  _but you lu han, you changed him for good_.  
  
  


 

 

 

  
  
  
 **attachment**  
  
it's been a year since you've set your way and sehun had his. however, karma's finally paying off and you're lucky enough to see him again at kyungsoo's party. the thick silence that forms when he enters the room, an hour later than kyungsoo had originally settled, can be cut with a knife and crossed with a bullet. it's terrifying that he looks different. he looks better, healthier and happier than you had imagined (or maybe, you've been feeling like shit since then and you want everyone to feel the same way as you do).  
  
what's more terrifying, though, is that his hands aren't empty. sehun's pretty fingers are intertwined with others.  
  
and everything suddenly,  
  
crashes.  
  


 

 

 

  
  
  
 **forever (not ever)**  
  
 _what did you expect?_  jongin spits with such ferocity and anger at you that taking a few steps back had never seemed a good idea before. you sputter words that sound like bullshit to your own ears. _i just didn't know_  you whisper before taking another sip of your beer  _i never intended to make him feel like this_. what did you make him feel, though? if everything you see, three tables in front of you, are the same crescent-moon-like eyes and pink color filling his cheeks. what did you make him feel?  
  
  
  


 

 

  
 **post traumatic love effect**  
  
  
you fucked up. really bad. tugging at his shirt and kissing him hours after that night, alcohol running through your veins and sadness filling your throat, choking you almost, wasn't a nice move. sehun isn't yours anymore, but what can you do? cheat. cheat and steal him for a night that won't pay for the time you've been hurting.  
  
  
  
  
the kisses he leaves in your neck. the touches he drags along your hips. the content sighs you hear from him whilst biting your thighs are real.  
  
  
  
for a moment.  
  
  


 

 

  
  
 **are you tired of me?**  
  
everything that has a beginning, has an end.  
  
  
  
things seem better today. you feel better, even. the breeze that makes you adjust the scarf around your neck is comfortable enough to hum happily while crossing the street. you're almost there, almost able to reach baekhyun and tell him that  _perhaps_  there's still a chance between you and sehun. and as you enter the shop, ready to spill it out like a high schooler experiencing her first innocent romance, you notice sehun with  _him_ , sweet honey dripping from the words he says, tugging gently at the boy's jacket.  
  
  
  
 _i'll keep you_.


End file.
